Contour 101 – “KUWTK” Edition … GOD Help Me!

So this is not the “full” post about contouring (there cannot be just one “full post” anyway!) but I’m STILL watching this stupid “KUWTK” because, yet again, I STILL DO NOT “GET IT” and I’m on the episode where Kim launches her “contour sticks” or whatever it is. And I have to say … WRONG!

To back this up, I will just make two quick points. 1. I have had to take all of my “official government” photos with full-on “moon face.” I have contoured it out ENOUGH so that I am identifiable with or without said crazy “moon face.” AND 2. My sister has said for MANY, MANY years now that my “contouring skills make the Kardashians look like amateurs.” I will agree with that statement for many reasons, the first of which is that they often look like they are wearing stage makeup or clown makeup it is just SO MUCH MAKEUP and the second of which is the POINT of this short post.

THAT POINT IS THAT CONTOUR (that is, the darker shades you use to create the appearance of recesses in your face or shadows – for example, the shadow that would be “created” under your cheekbones – I actually have them, so I am fortunate in that regard, thank you Lakota heritage! – or the “dark” recessed area sometimes along the hairline and under the jawbone) CANNOT BE “UNIVERSAL” (even “light,” “medium” and “dark” or even if you throw “fair” and “deep” in there!) and IT ABSOLUTELY CANNOT BE SHIMMERY / SHINY. CONTOUR SHADES MUST BE ABSOLUTELY MATTE. The reason for this is that shiny areas (i.e., “highlighted areas”) create the illusion of “popping” out – a very simple example we all know of is looking at a clear night sky – the dark sky looks infinite in depth but the SHINY “white”-looking moon and stars (and planets) seem almost to “pop” out while they “twinkle” at you. It’s the same thing with makeup. Makeup is really just knowing colors and color “effects” and how they work … period. You do not want to utilize a shiny or shimmery “contour” shade because it will be counterproductive or simply appear as if you are wearing makeup that you really didn’t know how to apply correctly. Perhaps once you learn how to “contour” with matte shades you can play around with things like “bronzer” (which is totally different from contouring!) – but that’s for a MUCH later discussion!

THAT is my “rant” / comment for my “makeup” talks for today! I strongly suggest if you really do want to “follow along” with this one, that you go to a Sephora or an Ulta or any other beauty store (although maybe now might not be the best time for that …) and just find what shades and undertones work best for you in terms of contouring – sometimes the “results” can be quite surprising! I will definitely get into that more later, but for now, please just 1. find your “tone” and more importantly “undertone,” 2. work on that jawline “definition” (I will write that one up more completely as well), and 3. just play around with different contour shades and see what might work for you – BUT DO NOT USE ANYTHING SHIMMERY – AT LEAST NOT UNTIL YOU ARE LIKE A MAKEUP MASTER AND STILL MAYBE NOT EVEN THEN! But as an example for yinz, I have a “light” very yellow/golden undertone type of skin … HOWEVER, I play around with makeup all the time (as I have said here before and as I have said elsewhere before, it makes me feel more “cheerful” and more “normal”) and I have found that TWO of the shades that really work the “best” for contouring on my skin tone and undertone are ORANGE and DEEP PURPLE. And I can tell you, when I have done my “makeup” this way, no one notices that the colors are whacky – in fact, I have frequently received compliments! Keep that in mind as well!!

At any rate, I hope you are all doing well this “Friday the 13th” (or later wherever you are in the world!). I know things are getting a little scary and dicey out there with this “COVID-19” bit, but please just try to remain calm (stress and lack of sleep are things that just invite illness) and do the best you can – wash your hands as frequently as possible, wear a mask if you are immunocompromised (again, you can never EXPECT others to be responsible!), do not touch your face, make sure to disinfect frequently touched surfaces, etc. Just be cautious and be prepared – there really isn’t much more we can do in life, especially as “spoonies” and especially as individuals who are already at greater risk of contracting any pathogen that causes a “pandemic” (or even … any pathogen!). I try to look at it the way my sister phrased it to me – “now so many people sort of get how you have to live every day of your life!” It’s true!

So I am, from the bottom of my heart, wishing you all happiness and health now and this weekend and for as long as it can perpetuate! Stay well and be well lovey doves!!!

❤ Always, Beth


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