Freaky Friday

This has been a strange day, no doubt. More on that … perhaps … to come. At any rate, I just wanted to make this a LEGIT LEGIT quick post. Here we go!

Last weekend I was visiting a neighbor / friend in Nazareth; we walked “uptown” for a few hours but it was very hot outside so we decided to head back to her house (actually, her husband came looking for her and gave us a ride back!). We got inside and sat down to chat when we looked across the way at the apartment / house I had been living in; there were a couple of pickup trucks there moving furniture into the apartment I had lived in for six months. My friend quick grabbed my shirt and said “COME ON!” and she led me out onto the porch so we could spy to see who might be moving in or what might be going on.

Although we never figured much out, we did watch as one of the other “tenants” from the apartment above (that’s many long stories!) was forced to park in her parking space (she has one of the only “parking spaces” on the entire street and parking is really limited – that is, when everyone is “home,” there isn’t enough “street parking” for all the people who live there. However, whenever there IS a space that is closer to the house, this person makes sure to park there – I think both out of disgust for life in general and out of laziness … although my time there verifies both, I “shouldn’t” make such “unkind” speculations!); she quickly walked from her car up my former stairs (walking up their staircase meant you had to walk AROUND the house …) and darted inside. My friend / former neighbor missed her going inside altogether. But I watched closely to see what her overall mannerisms were – if things had “changed” since I had left (let’s just say this person didn’t like me at all….). I genuinely thought she would walk with some “pep in her step” now that I was gone … but strangely enough, she looked terribly miserable, with a visible frown on her face and stomp-like footsteps. She seemed just as unhappy with life with or without me. Which leads me to two points which coincide.

1. We often think the reactions of others is due to something we did or didn’t do – in other words, we often attribute the behavior of others to our own flaws. I am terribly guilty of this – perhaps more than most people. I take things VERY personally (although I advise others not to do so!), especially when those things involve people with whom I have “assumed” some kind of definable relationship. HOWEVER – we (meaning ME too!) have to remember that not only are other people doing the same thing with others, but people are often so consumed with whatever is or is not going on in their lives to think that far in terms of your relationship with them. For example, I always wondered what it was about me that “pissed” these “neighbors” off so much because I had never been anything but friendly toward them. HOWEVER, my mistake was in thinking I had ANYTHING to do with the equation. Obviously this person was just as unhappy when I wasn’t there as when I was there (at least that is my empirically-based assumption!). This goes a bit farther in more “involved” relationships (see many previous posts!) – sometimes other people just happen to have bad days, and, although you might be in the proverbial “line of fire,” that fire isn’t being directed at you. I try to remind myself of my place in the universe (as I have mentioned before!) – that I am just a very small part of a very massive system of things we don’t even know of yet – and in that, I have to check myself when I attribute so much of another person’s actions toward myself. That is just foolish.

2. LIVE LIFE IN A WAY THAT MAKES YOU HAPPY. I know there are times that are awful for all of us – I KNOW as someone who has suffered with chronic disease for as long as I have how brutal life can be (and I haven’t even REALLY seen how brutal life can be, you know?). Again, I am not spouting off some “positivist” nonsense because I believe most of it is just that – I am just saying that if you can go about the things you have to do with a spring in your step, if you talk with people with an air of playfulness and fun, everything gets just a little bit better. And that does propagate as well. If you start to act like you’re having FUN, not only WILL you have fun, but you will start to attract more “fun” kinds of people and people who are already in your life will notice that quality in you. I say all of this from personal experience – I have lived both ways, and, all other things being equal, it really is more fun to be fun and to have fun than to wallow in whatever “badness” is bogging you down at the time (and there is ALWAYS something!). Do a little hop, make a goofy joke, say “HI!” with a little extra cheerfulness – a little joy really can move mountains. The same “random” shit in life is going to go down regardless of your attitude or feeling toward or about it – you might as well have some fun. “Dance in the rain.”

So that is what I wanted to say! Basically, don’t give too much credence toward what you might perceive as the “negative” reaction of another person to you – realize that person has his or her own life and, as I have said here MANY TIMES, YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT SOMEONE ELSE IS GOING THROUGH. And with that, practice HAPPINESS. Don’t be fake. Just have a little more fun than you usually do. Smile a little more. Check out a strange store you wouldn’t usually enter. Walk down a different street. You only live once. And time will bring whatever time brings; and all we can do in the “interim” is do what we want and NEED to do to the greatest extent possible – and have FUN while doing it.

As always, thank you for taking the time to read this post! I hope you have all had a wonderful Friday – at the very least, a FUN “Freaky Friday!” I hope you are all having a happy and healthy day or night, wherever you are in the world!

❤ Always, Beth